You know that scene in “Inside Out” when Riley has a core memory that is full of sadness and joy? That’s how I’ve felt for the past few days.
I’m incredibly happy and thankful that I wasn’t hurt worse than I was. I was so relieved when they told me there was no spinal cord damage indicated. I’m so grateful it’s “just a broken back.” But I’m so sad about how incredibly hard my Amber has to work to take care of me. I know exhaustion was an exit she passed 60 miles ago, but she’s still going.
I’m sad for the things I’m not getting done at work and my little side hustles. But I’m so thankful for my coworkers who have stepped up to take the load. I’m sad about the projects around the house that I’m won’t be able to work on for months, but I’m so thankful for the folks who have offered to help out.
I was downright exuberantly gleeful that I could stand up long enough to make a cup of coffee this morning! But I was heartbroken when my boys gave me a hug this morning and my littlest said “I can’t hug you. I don’t want to break you more.”
I know this is only a season, and honestly I’m not taking this too hard. I’m just coming to accept this will be a season with a mix of joy and sadness, and that’s ok.